You know you’ve arrived when…

All my life – ever since I was a child I wanted to be on TV.

My dream finally came true in 2005 when I became a news anchor.

From then on my on-air career grew from strength strength.

In 2007 while the world was crumbling under the pressure of the financial crisis my career took an unexpected turn into the world of financial reporting. I thrived in my new found passion as a financial journalist and felt I had found my piece in the world. Never had I enjoyed anything like I did reporting on the markets and everything else that was buzzing in the world of business.

Being a business news anchor was a dream I hadn’t dreamed and yet there I was living it – and loving every single moment of it. And yet happy as I was, while parts of me felt fulfilled, I still felt as though I hadn’t fully arrived. There were things to aspire to – more to achieve. Something was missing and so my pursuit continued, even though at times I wasn’t quite sure what it was I was chasing.

Fast forward to December 2012:  I was invited to a dinner with five other incredible women. Each one extremely accomplished in her career.

The event’s organiser was a successful entrepreneur. The rest of the dinner guests ranged from high powered attorneys to senior executives in various fields. These women were all successful and polished.

To be quite honest I’m usually quite intimidated by such company. But not this time. And this time I had every reason to feel like an underachiever in the blinding light of these women because I was the only one who was well… a stay-at-home mom.

Oh sorry did I skip that part?

Let’s rewind a little.

So there came a time in my illustrious TV career when I realised my life was taking a different path. No longer did my heart desire to reach higher heights in TV. And for that particular moment the dream had changed.

Sitting at a posh Sandton Hotel, having dinner with those five women, every decision that had led to me quitting my TV job and plunging into the unknown, was confirmed as completely right – for me.

The host of the dinner had asked us to come to the event ready to discuss the following:

  1. The book that stood out most for us in 2012 and why
  2. Share an item on our bucket list
  3. The legacy we wanted to leave behind

My responses were the following:

1. The Dip by Seth Godin. For a long time I’d known I needed to make some significant changes in my life. Among them: Quit my job and focus on what my heart was tugging at me to do. After reading The Dip (at like 3am!) I promptly wrote my resignation letter and started on the path that had been beckoning me.

2. “To be quite honest I don’t really have one. I enjoy and have come to appreciate the seemingly mundane aspects of my life. There are times I blow bubbles for my son in the kitchen. As I watch him chase and try to catch them I find myself marvelling at the splendour of those moments as the happiest in my life. When I became a mom I didn’t need to achieve anything more. Being me – just being me was enough.”

3. “I am living the legacy I want to leave behind. I get responses from people who are so encouraged and uplifted by experiences I share on various platforms, including my two blogs, and yet I’m doing nothing special really. I’m just being me. And turns out me just being me is touching lives – and that’s what I’ve always wanted to do. And now without even trying, I’m doing just that.”

Did my responses mean that I’d stopped dreaming or that I had ceased aspiring beyond my role as a mother? Or my work as a writer and coach? Not at all.

My responses surprised even me. They made me realise that even though I hadn’t noticed it – I had arrived!

The destination I was at was nothing like what I’d envisioned for myself as a young girl. Far from it. And yet never had I known more joy.

Every day I learn that sometimes simple is marvellously remarkable if we allow it to be.

I still have dreams. I still wish for certain things. I still have massive ambitions. But the difference now is that even if those dreams don’t come true, or my wishes are not fulfilled or even if I don’t achieve my many ambitions – I will still be happy.

I am blessed not because I have everything a girl could possibly want but because my heart is full. What I feel is enough. And enough is enough. For me. According to my  standards.

I am grateful for what I have. Everything I acquire is an addition to the already complete life I have. Everything I desire that doesn’t pan out I have come to accept as not meant for me. And I promptly move on.

Growing up I always had grand imaginations of what it would be like to have my dreams come true. I overcame the many obstacles that came my way in the knowledge that one day my circumstances would change and I would “arrive”.

Arriving has a totally different meaning for me now.

It’s not as grand or as glamourous as I had imagined it to be all my life. And yet for me – it’s absolutely perfect.

For me arriving has been this: An end to the endless chase for more.

My belief is that you know you’ve arrived when “Arriving” is no longer the goal.

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